Last Weekend

I was back home at Seremban last long weekend. When first step in my house saw my mum I was shocked. She shrink down a lot and a lot! Heartache to see her like this. Sis told me she has been more than a week didn't eat much and drink much. Only had 1 cup of cereal juice and that's it for one whole day. And my mum is not a water person. She doesn't like to drink water. Due to she doesn't eat...she has no energy. Can't wake up by herself and walk also difficult. Everyday said tired and wanted to sleep. We tried to force her drink liquid food such as fruit juices but she will never finished. Worst thing is know that she has lots of ulcers on her tongue and mouth. Why all these happened? Last Monday she had a chemo and since then she can't eat and body got heaty especially she doesn't drink water.

I don't mean to scold mum but I have to. I want her to know what is important now and what she needs to do. If she keeps on like this will get wearker and weaker. Whatever we should say we said it. Whatever we should do we did it. But doesn't change anything. Is herself that not strong enough and change the situations. She also told sis..."no eat no drink just die will do"....oh no..she thinks so...she wanted to give up. I know she is. She has no fighting mind to get better. :( She may be just don't want burden us, she wanted to go as soon as possible. But we don't want...we wanted her recover and stay forever with us. We were trying hard and I know sis the most and she exhausted as well. Now only my sis taking care of her full time. I know she also fed up seeing mum like this. It is really sad and as if a knive slash on your heart when seeing your family being such suffer situations....and yet you can't do anything! It is all about herself. How she thinks and how she wants to be. If she still stays unhappy like this it doesn't help the situations. But if she stubborns to be like this what we can do??

Mum admitted to hospital on Monday. Doctor said she has infections on her mouth, her lung. Needs to have some time to stay in hospital to get recover. My siblings decided may not give her chemo for time being. May be is better for her. Hopefully she gets better after this. Let's pray for my mum. It's a new year ahead and I wish my mum gets healthier and always with us....